There’s no doubt that many food cravings have a physiological basis, but if we’re honest with ourselves, many of us also use food as a mood booster.
Having written a book on the four steps to winning your inner battle with food, I know all about emotional overeating. It used to be that I couldn’t walk past a snack machine without feeling like there was a giant magnet in my pocket drawing me toward the coin slot. If I went to a dinner party and somebody left a half-eaten piece of pie on the table, that’s where my attention went. Instead of focusing on the conversation around me, I zeroed right in on that plate, wondering how anyone could eat only half a dessert!
I was addicted to food. Food was my drug of choice. I could definitely identify with the word “HALT”-an acronym used by those in addiction recovery as a way of staying in touch with your feelings. There’s no doubt that when you’re Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired, you’re more likely to give in to temptation, like that chocolate chip cookie that calls to you relentlessly from the sealed bag in the cupboard.
But it’s totally coincidental that the four-step process I introduce in Conquer Your Cravings is based on the same four letters. While it’s helpful to be aware of some of the triggers that can lead to overeating (hunger, anger, loneliness, and tiredness), it’s even more important to know how to overcome your cravings when they hit. If you’re constantly at war with food . . . if you think that food is the enemy . . . then you’ve been sabotaging yourself.
Food is not the enemy-your erroneous thoughts are. These often subconscious thoughts bombard your brain and keep you trapped on an emotional merry-go-round. I call that ride the craving cycle, and it goes like this:
- You have a negative thought about yourself (which may or may not be food-related);
- You experience anxiety and other negative emotions;
- You get the uncontrollable urge to eat to make you feel better;
- You experience more discomfort and anxiety as you struggle against the craving;
- You surrender and eat something;
- You feel bad for eating when you really didn’t want to;
- You have negative thoughts about yourself;
- You feel even worse;
- You get the uncontrollable urge to eat.
And on and on it goes. Is it any wonder your cravings never go away? This repetitious pattern will continue until you learn how to stop it. If you want to free yourself from non-hungry, emotional overeating, you need to attack your improper thought patterns and replace them with the kind of winning beliefs that will bring you permanent relief from your cravings. Rather than fearing the next craving, you need to meet it head-on with an entirely new plan of action. And that’s where the HALT process comes in.
If you’re ever going to stop obsessing about food, you need to stop the destructive craving cycle in its tracks, preferably in its earliest stages. You need to recognize that the enemy is lurking right inside your head and call a HALT to this nonproductive pattern. You need to:
- Hear your thoughts-the negative ones that lead you to overeat;
- Allow yourself to feel-for until now, rather than feeling the bad along with the good, you’ve learned to mask unpleasant feelings with food;
- Listen to your intuition-for your inner guidance system will tell you if it’s okay to eat that extra slice of pizza or not;
- Treat yourself lovingly-because if you’ve let food rule your life, you probably haven’t been taking the best care of yourself.
The four steps work because they attack the very things that keep you trapped in the craving cycle:
- They cause you to become aware of the thought processes that have been leading to your cravings, and show you how to turn them around in an instant.
- They help you identify the emotions your eating has been covering up.
- They introduce you to a powerful source of guidance that’s inside you and is available to help you 24 hours a day.
- They teach you to treat yourself with kindness and respect, rather than undermining all your best efforts.
Each step offers new ways of thinking, new ways of looking at yourself, and new ways of dealing with your problems, so when a craving hits, you’ll be able to use whichever solution works for you at the moment.
The next time you become aware of a craving, stop and literally say “HALT” in your mind. Ask yourself what brought on the craving: Are you hungry, angry, lonely, or tired? Or maybe you just looked in the mirror and you didn’t like what you saw? Did you read something unpleasant that reminded you of yourself and you suddenly want to eat something gooey instead of feeling bad?
Now that you’ve heard your thoughts, wallow in the emotions they dredged up for a minute. If the feeling isn’t especially comfortable, simply accept it, then release it. Find a new way of thinking that will make you feel better. Take control of your thoughts and use them to instantly raise your mood instead of turning to food.
Once you start paying more attention to the thoughts and emotions that trigger your cravings, tune in to other subtle feelings in your body. Realize that you have an inner source of guidance that will tell you what’s best for you in any given moment. Does looking at that doughnut in the display case make your mouth drool but your stomach clench? Buy a toasted bagel, instead, and feel the release.
Find more long-term ways to treat yourself lovingly on a regular basis, such as talking nicely to yourself instead of putting yourself down. While you’re at it, start a new exercise routine!
Relief from your cravings begins with awareness, followed by action. As you start to apply the four steps, you’ll no longer struggle when faced with the overwhelming desire to eat. You’ll learn that cravings don’t necessarily mean failure. Instead of being something to fear, cravings will represent an opportunity to put your new strategy to work and succeed in ways you never thought possible.
Instead of reaching for a bowl of ice cream the next time a craving hits, call a HALT. Hear your thoughts and allow yourself to feel them. Eating when you’re not really hungry is not a loving way to treat yourself. Listen to your intuition, then treat yourself lovingly.
My readers have told me that the HALT process has changed their life. Make the decision today to become a conscious eater and change your life for the better.
Suzanne Giesemann is a writer and motivational speaker who focuses on personal excellence and spiritual growth. She is a former Navy Commander who served as a leadership instructor, commanding officer, and aide to the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff on 9/11. Her other books include "The Priest and the Medium", "It’s Your Boat Too (A Woman’s Guide to Greater Enjoyment on the Water)", and the memoir "Living a Dream". Web site: www.SuzanneGiesemann.com
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