Perfectly Hidden Depression: When You Look Fine But Are Falling Apart on the Inside

Naturally Savvy Podcast

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Show Summary

You recognize something is wrong, but you're not sure what exactly…only that you feel trapped and alone.

When your life looks perfect, but you're silently falling apart…

If you were raised to believe that painful emotions are a sign of weakness, or if being vulnerable has always made you feel unsafe, then you may have survived by creating a perfect-looking life — a life where you appear to be successful, engaged, and always there for others.

The problem? You're filled with self-criticism and shame, and you can't allow yourself to express fear, anger, loss, or grief. You recognize something is wrong, but you're not sure what exactly…only that you feel trapped and alone. If this sounds like you, you may have perfectly hidden depression (PHD).

Margaret Robinson Rutherford, PhD, has a new book out about PHD, entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression: How to Break Free from the Perfectionism that Masks Your Depression.

In the book, you'll begin the process of understanding your perfectionism, identifying destructive beliefs, and connecting with emotions suppressed for far too long. You'll also find tangible tips for quieting that critical inner voice, and powerful strategies for coping with difficult feelings. Most importantly, you'll learn that asking for help isn't a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength.

Dr. Rutherford joins host Lisa Davis to share more insights from the book and how you can learn to stop hiding and start healing.

Show Notes

[1:24] How is "Perfectly Hidden Depression" defined and the factors that can create this?

[6:50] What are some of the signs in others you might see?

[12:28] Strategies to help with healing.

[23:20] How to break the silence.

[Editor's Note: Please consult with your physician before changing anything about your medical care. If you ever have thoughts of hurting yourself, please seek help immediately.]

Show Links

Dr. Margaret Rutherford's Website

Dr. Rutherford's Book:

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Lisa Roth Collins is a Registered Holistic Nutritionist (RHN) and is the Marketing Manager at She is passionate about health and wellness and tries her best to make healthier choices every day for herself and her family. Her journey to natural health was driven by her own struggles with digestive discomfort, depression, and anxiety. Lisa returned to school in 2014 to study nutrition at the Canadian School for Natural Nutrition. She threw herself into her studies so she could learn as much as she could to help herself feel better and thrive. Upon completing the program and being certified as an RHN, Lisa began her work at Naturally Savvy where she has been able to help so many people learn to make healthier choices for themselves. Through her work, she has connected with so many incredible people in the industry whether other authors, influencers, or brands. Plus, she is affectionately known as "Techie Spice" because of her ability to wrap her head around technology. Every day she gets up with a renewed sense of energy and ready to make a difference. You can read all of Lisa's content here. In her spare time, Lisa loves to try new recipes, make delicious and nourishing meals, and she is an avid reader. For more information about Lisa, check out her profile on here.